6 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
January 4, 20248 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
January 8, 20247 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
There’s a lot of conversation about Attachment Styles or Attachment Theory as we collectively evaluate our personal relationships.
Attachment styles are psychological frameworks that describe how individuals relate to others in close relationships, particularly in the context of emotional bonds.
The premise here is that we’re “hard-wired” or programmed in our earliest years as to how to engage in relationships.
Ultimately, each of us desires to love and be loved, to have our needs met, to trust our care providers, and to feel a stable and consistent sense of love and caring.
The early bonds between children and their caregivers sets the groundwork (like it or not!) for the way in which each and every one of us seek out romantic partnerships and it also shows up with friendships, family of origin dynamics, and work colleagues.
These styles are characterized by patterns of emotional and behavioral responses to attachment-related situations.
Psychologist Mary Ainsworth (and others) have conducted extensive research on attachment theory, leading to the identification of four main attachment styles.
Most of us fall more distinctly into one category and yet many can have more of a “hybrid” attachment style. Yet the four “official” attachment styles are a great place to start.
The 4 Attachment Styles
Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment
Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment
Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized/Chaotic) Attachment
Secure Attachment
Attachment styles can develop early in life based on interactions with caregivers and later influence how individuals engage in adult relationships.
However, they are not fixed and can be modified or change over time through therapy, self-awareness, and new relationship experiences.
Understanding your attachment style and that of your partner can be valuable in improving communication and relationship dynamics.
Let’s break down how the 7 Life Path might engage or present with each Attachment Style.
**I’m not a licensed therapist and this article is meant to offer a numerological perspective that might shed light on the core issue each Life Path might have that within each described Attachment Style. It is not meant to diagnose or be prescriptive.
7 Life Path
Code Word: DISCONNECTED
7 Life Path | Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment: People with anxious-preoccupied attachment styles often have a high need for emotional closeness and fear abandonment. They are inclined to worry about their relationships and may be excessively preoccupied with their partners. This attachment style can lead to clinginess, a fear of rejection, and a tendency to seek constant reassurance and validation.
This attachment style may present as someone who has major trust issues. They can be the person who is untrustworthy or they can be the person who consistently partners with people who lie, are untrustworthy or betray the relationship. With the Anxious-Preoccupied attachment style, a the 7 Life Path reacts with unhealthy anxiety and constant vigilance (if not physically, at least mentally). Co-dependencies abound (incessant text check-in’s, anyone?) and this relationship style leaves the 7 feeling lost, out of place, and unfulfilled.
7 Life Path | Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment: Individuals with dismissive-avoidant attachment styles often value their independence and self-sufficiency. They may downplay the importance of close relationships and may be uncomfortable with emotional intimacy. These individuals tend to be emotionally distant, self-reliant, and may have difficulty expressing their own feelings or empathizing with the emotions of others.
For the 7 Life Path, this attachment style in their wheelhouse. The 7 Life Path is innately more of a loner who needs their alone time and “white space.” They’re thinkers, processors, and (let’s face it) are on a different wavelength. Under the best of circumstances, the 7 Life Path isn’t the simplest person to understand. There’s a lot going on in there! And the 7 often is challenged with connecting with themselves emotionally, therefore connecting with others emotionally can prove to be doubly-challenging. This attachment style can be the default for the 7. With a history of betrayals and being misunderstood, often the 7 resorts to this attachment style because actually being in a relationship is a price the 7 isn’t (ultimately) willing to pay.
7 Life Path | Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized/Chaotic) Attachment: This attachment style is characterized by a combination of anxious and avoidant traits. Individuals with a fearful-avoidant style want close relationships but also have a fear of being hurt or rejected. They may struggle with inconsistent behavior, vacillating between the desire for closeness and the need for distance. This attachment style can be rooted in past traumas or unresolved issues.
This attachment style shows up for the 7 Life Path when they’re more aligned with the challenging elements of the 7 – superficiality, heightened ego, lack of emotional intelligence. One of the mantras for the 7 Life Path is: “I really long for a relationship, but I really don’t want one.” In this scenario, the 7 Life Path can intellectualize their relationships or their needs for intimate connection (or any relationship connection, for that matter). They are controllers and perfectionists, so this attachment style offers “the best of both worlds;” they can opt in and opt out at will.
7 Life Path | Secure Attachment: Individuals with secure attachment styles tend to have a positive view of themselves and others. They are comfortable with intimacy, trust their partners, and believe that they can depend on others as well as be depended upon. They are able to express their emotions and needs openly and deal with conflict in a healthy manner. These individuals are generally more self-assured and less anxious or avoidant in their relationships.
This attachment looks like the healthiest and most dynamic version of the 7 Life Path! With a Secure attachment style, the 7 Life Path has a healthy balance between their spiritual nature and their intellectual nature. With this attachment style, the 7 Life Path displays an innate trust in the flow of themselves and the flow of life. They’re wise, healthy (emotionally, physically, and in every other way), and content. Their life is an adventure in researching and exploring life’s most profound questions. In relationship, they’re secure, fine to be alone for a bit (and allow their partner the same), and eager to have a deep, soulful connection with their loved one.