5 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
January 3, 20247 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
January 5, 20246 Life Path | What’s Your Attachment Style?
There’s a lot of conversation about Attachment Styles or Attachment Theory as we collectively evaluate our personal relationships.
Attachment styles are psychological frameworks that describe how individuals relate to others in close relationships, particularly in the context of emotional bonds.
The premise here is that we’re “hard-wired” or programmed in our earliest years as to how to engage in relationships.
Ultimately, each of us desires to love and be loved, to have our needs met, to trust our care providers, and to feel a stable and consistent sense of love and caring.
The early bonds between children and their caregivers sets the groundwork (like it or not!) for the way in which each and every one of us seek out romantic partnerships and it also shows up with friendships, family of origin dynamics, and work colleagues.
These styles are characterized by patterns of emotional and behavioral responses to attachment-related situations.
Psychologist Mary Ainsworth (and others) have conducted extensive research on attachment theory, leading to the identification of four main attachment styles.
Most of us fall more distinctly into one category and yet many can have more of a “hybrid” attachment style. Yet the four “official” attachment styles are a great place to start.
The 4 Attachment Styles
Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment
Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment
Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized/Chaotic) Attachment
Secure Attachment
Attachment styles can develop early in life based on interactions with caregivers and later influence how individuals engage in adult relationships.
However, they are not fixed and can be modified or change over time through therapy, self-awareness, and new relationship experiences.
Understanding your attachment style and that of your partner can be valuable in improving communication and relationship dynamics.
Let’s break down how the 6 Life Path might engage or present with each Attachment Style.
**I’m not a licensed therapist and this article is meant to offer a numerological perspective that might shed light on the core issue each Life Path might have that within each described Attachment Style. It is not meant to diagnose or be prescriptive.
6 Life Path
Code Word: CONTROLLING
6 Life Path | Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment: People with anxious-preoccupied attachment styles often have a high need for emotional closeness and fear abandonment. They are inclined to worry about their relationships and may be excessively preoccupied with their partners. This attachment style can lead to clinginess, a fear of rejection, and a tendency to seek constant reassurance and validation.
This attachment style may present as someone who has a tendency to be the perfect partner; loving, committed, and can guess their partners needs before they even know what they are. Yet where does it get you? In a constant state of worry and agitation, the 6 Life Path wonders when it might be their turn to receive help or support. This style of attachment is a natural fit for the 6, given that they’re natural nurturers and help-mates. Yet it triggers where the 6 needs the most development and the most secure boundaries. This attachment style promotes the innate tendency for the 6 Life Path to worry, control, manage, and be hyper-vigilant.
6 Life Path | Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment: Individuals with dismissive-avoidant attachment styles often value their independence and self-sufficiency. They may downplay the importance of close relationships and may be uncomfortable with emotional intimacy. These individuals tend to be emotionally distant, self-reliant, and may have difficulty expressing their own feelings or empathizing with the emotions of others.
For the 6 Life Path, this attachment style is interestingly antithetical to their natural make-up. The 6 Life Path is built for relationships, yet that doesn’t mean they’re good at creating healthy ones! Or at least not at the get-go. Since relationships are a main topic of soul-learning for the 6 Life Path, they get a few runs around the track in order to learn to discern the differences between healthy connection and unhealthy connection. The Dismissive-Avoidant attachment style is the result of harsh judgement about people/partners that’s based on sky-high idealism. With this attachment style, expectations about others’ behaviors are way out of proportion, leading to the 6 Life Path being perpetually disappointed and – in this case – to the point of simply not actively participating in creating or building a relationship.
6 Life Path | Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized/Chaotic) Attachment: This attachment style is characterized by a combination of anxious and avoidant traits. Individuals with a fearful-avoidant style want close relationships but also have a fear of being hurt or rejected. They may struggle with inconsistent behavior, vacillating between the desire for closeness and the need for distance. This attachment style can be rooted in past traumas or unresolved issues.
This attachment style shows up for the 6 Life Path when they enter into relationships with the over-active aspects of the 6; taking responsibility for everyone and everything (over-the-top!), enabling irresponsible behaviors in others, and feeling under-valued and under-appreciated. This can also show up on the other end of the spectrum, when the 6 Life Path is irresponsible and unwilling to step up to the plate in their relationship life. Often this attachment style is predicated on the 6 Life Path having no healthy or secure personal boundaries, which then manifests itself as the 6 remaining silent about the infractions until they explode (or implode). This attachment style makes the 6 Life Path walk on eggshells of their own making – where issues come to the surface only when there is a “yes” or “no,” or “black” or “white” answer, rather than talking through issues as they occur.
6 Life Path | Secure Attachment: Individuals with secure attachment styles tend to have a positive view of themselves and others. They are comfortable with intimacy, trust their partners, and believe that they can depend on others as well as be depended upon. They are able to express their emotions and needs openly and deal with conflict in a healthy manner. These individuals are generally more self-assured and less anxious or avoidant in their relationships.
This attachment looks like the healthiest and most dynamic version of the 6 Life Path! With a Secure attachment style, the 6 Life Path is The Cosmic Parent! The balanced and secure 6 Life Path is a nurturing presence and gets deep satisfaction and pleasure out of being of service in a supportive yet boundaried way. The 6 Life Path with this attachment style is loving and lovable. They’re supportive yet allow others to make their own mistakes and to take responsibility for themselves. They’re able to speak up about their own personal needs and they care for themselves as lovingly as they care for others.