The Clarity Myth
Have you ever felt as though you’ve missed a big opportunity because you were waiting for clarity?
And when I say “clarity,” I mean that you were waiting for the perfect moment – to feel absolutely certain beyond a shadow of a doubt – that this person/situation/decision/move/fill-in-the-blank was IT.
How did you measure that sense of clarity? Was it a feeling? Or did it show up as something tangible? Or did it show up in a different way for you?
The reason I ask is because I find that everyone I work with (and I don’t exclude myself here!) is seeking “clarity” about something in their life; whether it’s a career change, relationship issue, or anything else that’s causing an internal rumble. Yet what I continue to run into is this:
Clarity is a myth.
And the myth of clarity keeps many people wallowing in a stagnant quagmire of angst, indecision, and paralysis. It’s as though they’re waiting for THE PERFECT moment where it all comes into pure, complete, white-light focus.
I’m finding that – for many people – the idea of clarity equals CONTROL.
Clarity = Control
Think about it. Most folks want clarity, which usually means that want to know exactly what to do, when to do it, and what the exact outcome is going to be. I’ll do a small disclaimer here: Some people define “clarity” a bit more fluidly. Yet the controlling formula for clarity is what I see most often.
If you go to my website, one of the things I say Numerology promises you (among many things) is a sense of clarity. Yet what does that really mean?
When I see people feeling really stuck, they often bemoan their lack of clarity. I’m discovering that it’s much more freeing – and effective! – to let go of the notion that clarity surrounding a certain issue is the goal.
So if not clarity, then what?
Shifting the focus from clarity to PURPOSE can pop open the door and allow actual movement rather than running in place and waiting for the mysterious veil to be lifted.
Purpose = Flow
When we focus on our sense of over-all purpose, clarity gets broken down into small incremental moments that afford you to make forward movement. So rather than waiting for that lightning bolt of surety – when you continue to live with your sense of purpose in front of you – clarity comes in snippets rather than in chunks. Simply taking some steps – almost any steps – toward something you feel purposeful about will bring better results that stewing in a paralytic stupor.
If you think about a time in your life when things felt right – when you felt amazing and empowered – what were you doing? Were you following your five-year plan or were you paying attention to your intuition and the way you feel? During that time, were you doing things that “made sense” or do you look back at it now and wonder how the heck you ended up doing whatever it was that was so awesome because how you ended up there was kinda weird?
That’s what I mean by purpose and flow. Usually what our mind tells us we should be doing and what we’re being called to do are speaking two distinctly different languages! When we’re stuck, we’re simply resisting what we already know “inside” of ourselves and yet its answer is at odds with the status quo.
So if you’re currently struggling with something and the prerequisite for making a decision is being struck by a lighting bolt of clarity, you’ll probably be hanging around and waiting a while.
When you can surrender to getting to know when and how you feel most purposeful – you might not follow a linear path – yet the little stops offs and detours might actually be the point.
Itty-Bitty Purpose Break-Down . . . by the Numbers
If you don’t know your Life Path number, see how to calculate it HERE.
One Life Path: Move toward initiating change, grooming your leadership abilities, learning how to be independent, and achieving self-actualization through achievement.
Two Life Path: Move toward honing your mediation skills, using your emotional sensitivity to assist others in achieving great outcomes, developing your intuition, and getting joy and satisfaction out of your loving relationships.
Three Life Path: Move toward expressing your real-true-authentic self, cultivating all things creative and artistic, becoming a master communicator who inspires and uplifts others.
Four Life Path: Move toward polishing up your planning/fixing/systems building genius, getting satisfaction out of attaining your goals, and work on allowing yourself to see the world in a more flexible way.
Five Life Path: Move toward becoming the Poster Child for the constructive use and expression of freedom, using your adventurous nature to explore the world and help others, and always move toward progression and focused change.
Six Life Path: Move toward learning how to modulate your sense of responsibility, using your nurturing, healing, and service-orientation to the good of others, and learn to back off from carrying the world (especially your families world) on your shoulders.
Seven Life Path: Move toward delving into the mystical, scientific, or philosophical world, getting to know yourself in the deepest and most profound way, and work at lighting up and living in the material world without being pessimistic and secretive.
Eight Life Path: Move toward embracing your experiences with money, power, and control in the material world, learning how to become an ethical and effective boss or authority, and learn to listen to others without being overbearing or intolerant.
Nine Life Path: Move toward becoming more understanding and compassionate of others, serving your humanitarian purpose of choice, and getting balance around giving and receiving.
Eleven/Two Life Path: Move toward using your challenges and hardships to help and heal yourself and others, getting your ego in check, and pace yourself – your Master Path is a marathon, not a sprint!
Twenty-Two-Four Life Path: Move toward using your power to build great things on a grand scale so that you can leave something of lasting value in the world, work hard and work smart, and pace yourself – your Master Path is a marathon, not a sprint!
Thirty-Three-Six: Move toward sharing your high levels of loving energies to help and heal others, using your joyful disposition to deal with everything in life, and pace yourself – your Master Path is a marathon, not a sprint!