Stuck? Get Transition Down To A “T”
So who’s with me?
Transition can be really hard. Confusing. Daunting. Frustrating. Depressing. [fill in your descriptor of choice here]
In my own life – and in my work with clients – feeling “stuck” is a reoccurring issue.
So what is “stuck?” And why do most of us feel this icky feeling in our lives? And when we do feel it, how can we recognize it and then move through it more rapidly and with greater success?
Five “T”s To Successful TRANSITION
1. TODAY-TOMORROW. Most of us feel stuck when we realize that where we are today is not where we want to be tomorrow. This can be physically, emotionally, financially. It can be focused on relationships, family, health. Whatever it is, you feel an intensity around the need to move in a different direction, even though you don’t know (with crystal clear clarity) what that different direction is. Which really means: You don’t have a clear sense of the final destination, despite the fact that you intrinsically know the basic direction that you’d like to shift into.
2. TRANSFORMATION. The kicker is that in order to get “unstuck,” we need to welcome transformation. And guess what? Transformation requires that we do things differently in a dramatic way. Health issues require a drastic change in the day-to-day ways in which we conceptualize our mind, body, and spirit – including changing routines and habits for the long-term. Relationship woes require that we take action around speaking our truth – which might result in leaving a relationship or recalibrating it substantially. Money issues require a drastic alteration in how we choose to make a living or how we engage with money on a deeper level. Yes, I’ll go back to the saying everyone’s already heard: The true mark of insanity is to continue to do the same things over and over again expecting different results.
3. TEARS. Feeling stuck is intensely emotional. It’s your soul reaching out to you and begging you to get on with it; to live in greater alignment with your purpose. This usually presents itself as a rather crazed (and dazed) subterranean emotional experience that makes you feel – er, crazy. When you’re in this state of being, in the “stuck” hovering mode – it can be a word, one interaction, one song, a “sign” from the Universe, or any other weird bump that makes you finally shift. You can hear about a friend of a friend cancelling their wedding a day before the nuptials and decide its time for your divorce. You can see the same word or number or image over and over and over again that gives you the strength you need to move to a different city. Usually, the “irrational” trumps “rational” every single time when you’re in this sort of transition period.
4. TIMING & TENACITY. Let’s face it. True transformation takes time and tenacity. (I love alliteration!) Often we get ourselves in hot water because we do a knee-jerk response (I’ll just quit my job today) because we aren’t willing to trust the idea that the Universe is actually conspiring FOR us. Yet timing is key. The trick here is then to continue to move forward rather than remain frozen in time. Many of us opt for analysis paralysis or remaining in situations that are comfortably uncomfortable. It takes fortitude and tenacity to recognize right timing, listen to your gut, follow your heart, and walk into what often feels like the Abyss.
5. TA-DA! Invariably, people who actively engage and work through the first four steps end up at their personal “Ta-Da!” phase. It’s not a destination. It’s a moment, a stopping off place of exhilaration and satisfaction that you’ve moved through a really hard patch and are now engaging in the new expanded YOU. The “Ta-Da!” phase offers you that moment where you feel as though you’ve successfully tripped the “reset” button and can re-engage in creating a life that’s more in sync with who you really are NOW.